Toxic Masculinity is not just being aggressive or impulsive as Men but also not being able to show Emotions, suppress it to that an extent that you stop feeling anything, stigmatize it to a level that feeling even a speck of it is a sign of weakness. Thus no wonder toxic taglines like “Men Don’t Cry ” and “Men doesn’t Feel Pain” get popularity. When a baby is born of any sexes- male, female, intersex, they cry, cry out loud, it’s necessary for the functioning of the lungs, delayed crying or not crying can cause severe damage to the child, even death, doctors put efforts to make the child cry. Then what does happens that something as natural and as essential as crying becomes nonexistent or a matter of shame or becomes a herculean task for Men. Something really really wrong must have been needed to reach this place. The problem is our Highly, Highly Patriarch Culture where the Man needs to be a Macho always, like some emotionless, feeling fewer robots. There is no place for Sensitivity, Empathy, Nurturing, Affection, Care, Emotionality for Man. Anything nurturing, it has to be women and anything protective or physically straining has to be Men. We can see as basic as a parent, the role of being a Mother or Father is so stereotypically gendered. A Mother is someone who nurtures, takes care of, gives love, care and affection, whereas a Father is someone who provides protection, provides with the finances and materialistic needs. So what has gender to do with it? Why can’t a Man or anyone of Non-Binary Gender be a Mother and why can’t a Women or any of Non-Binary Gender be a Father. Being Mom Dad’s are roles not Genders.
Toxic Masculinity is not just being a Narcissistic Jerk, where you just think you are Superior to everyone else just because you are a Man but it’s also in being emotionally absent or not being able to emotionally support your relationships, with your Loved Ones including Mom’s, Sisters, Girlfriends, Wives, Friends, Family. Children of any sexes feel emotions so intensely, they absorb it like a sponge, then why when the male children among these bunch of little ones grow up to be Man just find it taxing, kind of incapable of being of any emotional help or support to their loved ones. If Intellectual Disability is a Disability, why is not an Emotional Disability a Disability? Why is it that there are no Interventions for Emotional Enhancement, Compassion, Empathy in schools, no wonders we are having wars so frequently and the Third World War is not far. We are still dealing with a Global Pandemic, now the next disaster gonna be the 3rd World War.
Toxic Masculinity is not just normalizing anger or aggression in Men, it’s normalizing that the behaviors like – Men are not very expressive, Men are not very Emotional, Men don’t Get attached. I don’t think if a Women or a Non- Binary individual would have behaved like this we would have considered it right or fair then why do we normalize these things for men. Why is it’s ok for a man to act like this and not for other genders. I would like to point out that as a child of any sexes they get highly attached to their caregivers, even as adults Men they get attached too , they get emotional too but this Patriarch Culture just takes away the agency from Men to be anything softer, nurturing, affectionate, caring.
I have no intention of maligning any gender or sex, I have a problem with the dysfunctional, hierarchical patriarchy that resides in our blood, in all sexes and genders resulting informing of dysfunctional individuals. I am done putting up with this, shit, and I feel the first step to change something is to not be ok with what’s going on, question it, question everything about it, not accept any form of patriarchy, speak up when you feel something is wrong, something is not feeling right. At minimum, we can do it in our personal lives.
I wrote this, as a collection of my observations and thoughts. I was willing to get honest reviews on it, therefore posted here. In case the content is uncomfortable do inform me